请帮忙修改一下英语作文
初二的学生能写出这样的作文已经很了不起了。字数没有必要删减了。我提几点建议吧。
is coming=is around the corner
are traveling around 虽然可以表示将要做什么。不过我们一般用be going to 句型。可以说：are planning to travel outside or are going to travel around.
每一段开头都用be going to 有些单调。
可以这样写：
First of all,I give my sduty top priority.(把学习放在第一位）……
Besize,I think it is also quite valuable to spend my holiday time on some housework.……
Finally,I am going to spare some time to do physical exercise,which can help build my body and I can also find a lot of fun in the process.
This picture shows a cellphone on a pair of hands.The cellphone is commented TO BE not the original edition.That means many people steal others' technoleDge and produce products WHICH ARE not the original edition.They sell those cellphoneS at low priceS in THE market ,AND THIS bringS a lot of loss IN BOTH CUSTOMERS AND INCOME to the original edition company who has the right of PRODUCING the products .
This phenomenon is very common. THE government haD made many policies to stop this kind of phenomenon before. But it looks LIKE this phenomenon is Still aCTIve . I hope not only our government but also everyone of our society will TRY TO stop this bad phenomenon too. Let us respect others's brain, KNOWLEDGE AND hard work ,and let us make a harmonius society like a warm family .
2，“in nowadays”，改为“now”就行了，不要太复杂,因为前面没有写“history”。
3，在第二段开始的那句中“say”应改为过去式“said”，因为是已经说了的话。
4，最后一句中的“rather than”意思是：与其...倒不如...，建议您去掉“rather” ，因为在前面已经有个“more”，在句中已是比较级了。
Going on a diet
Many years ago,people ddi not have enough food to eat.They could not imagine that human beings would go on a diet nowadays.It is a joke.But this situation really exists in our daily life .A lot of girls refuse to eat meat in order to lose weight .They think that “the less weight,the more beauty”.Pelple have different views about it . Some support it ,while others disagree with it.
An old saying goes “Everybody has the mind of beauty”. However,going on a diet too much is harmful to our health.Fat,meat,sugar and so on are important to keep the balance of our body. If we don’t take them for a long time ,we will be lack of nutrition ,and won't have enough energy for study or work.What’s more , we may get stomach disease if we eat much less.
All in all,healthy is more important than the so-called beauty.
答：修改如下：My day Today is Friday. Is’s winday【应该是it is windy， 如果你的意思是“天气：有风”】 .I get【got，一般日记是用过去时写的】 up very early, because I didn’t finish【had not finished，过去的过去使用过去完成时】 my homewoke last night.I go【went】 to school ...
答：让我冒昧就您这篇作文提几句意见：我认为好的作文并不能仅是把许多单句集合一起。在描述一件事时，句子应该顺畅达意，有连贯性。对同一事物，最好能避免使用千篇一律的文字或语句来表达。您的作文，如果把它翻译成中文，大概会是如下的样子：这是我们的学校，欢迎您到来。体育馆[我猜您是指体育馆(...
答：第一篇修改如下：From:zhangmeng@163.com To:chlw524@sina.com Subject: problem Date: June 26 Dear Ms Li:I'm very glad to write to you.I always work very hard and have less rest because I always stay up for doing homework. And I don't have enough time for doing exerci...
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答：错误如图片所列：
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答：批改 □ Along with Chinese colleges and universities to expand enrollment.1、Chinese colleges and universities表示“中国人的大学”或“汉语大学”，改为colleges and universities in China 2、不定式to expand 表示“未来要扩大”，改为动名词expanding 3、句子缺少主体的主谓结构，应该补充完整，比如...
答：一个半小时的说法： one and a half hours You can buy many beautiful pen-bags which were did by ourselves in there.(你的原句）这句里面的错误有 were 和did2个动词一起并列，in there副词前面还带介词。You和ourselves 指示关系矛盾。可以改为：You can buy many beautiful DIY pen-bags...
答：It also can protect our environment . Dear fellow freind.,Let's create a better life[要用这个词] . , .thins is a meanning ful thing. We should do it together and hand in hand .[这两句是有点多余]ps ：时态错误比较多哦,建议多看看语法书。我觉得应该修改的都在文章里该好了...
