请帮忙修改一篇英语作文！！
If I can go to the ancient times
If I can go to the ancient times ,I think it will be very interesting .
For example .I can change the reasult of a war or even prevent a war .Or ,I can establish a dynasty to withstand faudal etiquette.Because I can’t stand those tragedy like “Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai”I think I can stop the world war . If I do that, I’ll make a big contribution to humanity.
If I can go to the ancient times……
It was （这里应加个the，表示特指）2:30 on May 12th 2008 when the earth begon（应该用began) to shake .The people in Sichuan were frightened 。Some of the people（前面已对the people做了介绍，这里应用them替代the people) escaped from the dangerous
places.but(in the meantime表示同时的意思，可替换but） most of the people（them代替the people) didn't（此处用failed to代替didn't) run out .they were buried in the（此处不需特指，可去掉the） ruins.some were injured seriously and some（此处用others 代替some) were dead .It seemed as if the world
was at（此处用had come to代替was at) an end . However(用fortunately代替however) , the(去掉the) soldiers came immediately .they brought hope to survivors. they rescued the people
who were trapped（此处用sieged代替trapped) .They gave their own foods and warter（单词错误，应是water) to survivors.also（用also的话，位置应提到gave之前，在此位置可用as well结尾） .they rescued people without
thinking about themselves .they were so great that I was moved by them（这里可以把by them去掉，因为前面已经说的很清楚了） .So.I would like to express my thanks to the soldiers（用them 代替the soldiers).the lovely people.
Not long front(这里应是from) that .the president Hu Jintao(应是Jintao Hu) came. he told the people who were buried in runs(ruins) to
hold on and the soldier（soldiers代替the soldier) would save them right away.He encouraged inspired the people and made them calm down to face the reality (这句话改成：He inspired the people to calm down, and to face the reality bravely).He gave confidence to the survious to live（加个on). So no words are strong enough
to express our thanks to the president Hu our lovely ieader(leader).
I'd also like to thank the workers who world(worked) hard to build a new city .After the earthquake .everything
wes(was) damaged,the city was in ruins.S(So) the workers came there to put the buildings in order .They make(made) the
city recovered lively. It is them that I really want to thanka(thank) for the lovely people.
There are so many lovely people .who were the most great（greatest代替the most great) and the loveliest .They gave out themselves(concentrated all their energy on giving unselfish help代替gave out themselves)
to the people ,to the city to the whole country .without any complain.They tried their best to help the（去掉the) people
people.(去掉此people)（加个and) to save the(去掉the) people .So,it's necessary to thank them.our lovely people .
At last .I will also thank you who act as good listeners.
（加个both) All of(去掉all of) you and them are the(去掉the) lovely people .and I will（去掉will) thank you by my heart(thank you by my heart改成thank you from the bottom of my heart) ,really thank you(去掉thank you,只要really).
Why do we abandon ourselves in games? In my Opinion, the reason is that we can not cure the temptation in the right way. Consequently, in order to resist this sort of temptation, we should calmly analyse it. Secondly, strengthen our willpower. We can avoild this non-beneficial condition by stopping all contact with bad friends. It is good to resist the temptation to computer games.We should learn how to encourage and supervise ourselves. It is the best way to resist the temptation.
(My personal opinion is that the structure of this essay/paragraph is very messy, i think you should try and tidy it up alittle bit, but you have good vocabulary)
许非常多,艺术设计多的确是的爱好艺术的确是的人有兴趣,但在计算的游戏,有些人上瘾的游戏,计算出如果他们没有控制住自己,它不仅会浪费时间,但也会伤害眼睛,很值得思考的问题,如何抗拒诱惑去计算的游戏。
为什么我们放弃自己玩游戏吗?在我看来,原因是我们不能正确对待这种诱惑.Consequently,为了抵御恶劣的诱惑,首先,我们必须提高认识到什么糟糕的诱惑和分析从容。第二,增强我们的意志我们可以避免的状态,不利于我们,停止与坏朋友它是好的,诱惑计算的游戏。
我们应该学会如何激励和监督自己…它是世界上最好的办法抗拒诱惑。
这些是翻译，你自己去看该如何改吧。
要学会自己该文章……
Many people are intrested in the compute games,however,some people addict themselves to the compute game.If they don`t control themselves well,not only will it waste time,but also harm eyes a lot .It is well worth thinking to the problem that how to resist the temptation to compute games.
Why do we abandon ourselves to playing games ?In my opinion,the reason is that we can`t treat the temptation rightly .Consequently,in order to resist the bad temptation,first of all,we should impove the understanding to what the bad temptation is and analyse calmly it.Secondly,strengthen our willpower.We can avoid to the condition which is not beneficial to us,stop contacting with the bad friends.It is good to resist the temptation to compute games.
We should learn to how to encourage and supervise ourselves.It is the best way to resist the temptation.
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