请高手帮忙翻译一段英文，十分感谢！
1。想象看那你的丈夫或者哥哥是坐了几年牢里举行最终将被释放。你犯了漫长的旅程,到监狱的,站在监狱门上,拼命想现在你会再次与你所爱的人,只听…”愚人节快乐!没有人被发布!“这经验发生在2000年4月,共有60人在Opinia阅读报纸,他们死去的亲人就要中释放出来的Baia母马监狱在罗马尼亚的照片。他们使长途旅行到监狱的,结果发现本文产生过愚人节玩笑。这Opinia以后要出版道歉。
2。2003年4月1日,成千上万名美国领导的联军部队在伊拉克了,伊拉克大使到俄罗斯,阿巴斯,Kunfuth复元在莫斯科举行了一场新闻发布会。许多人以为他宣布伊拉克承认失败。这一刻Kunfuth选择而不是举办一个恶作剧的新闻发布会上说。手里拿着一张纸上,他被认定为新闻电讯来自路透社从,他大声朗读:“美国人误发了一枚核弹,打死了7向英军。”立刻一片寂静满屋子的记者感到震惊。然后Kunfuth微笑着冲大喊:“四月的傻瓜!”仅几天之前因这意外的时刻,伊拉克政府完全坍塌。
Laser was found in the 20th century, 60's, because of its direction, and high brightness, good color, it is now widely used in medical, cosmetic, industrial, military and so on. The laser is a laser original Chinese name, is the stimulated emission of optical amplification means, laser engraving machine is laser engraving machine. Laser applications laser processing are the most promising one of the areas, while the laser carving laser processing technology is one of the areas biggest applications.
U.S. may be carved on the laser technology is not very familiar with, laser engraving machine in our daily life is also very rare; me here today, the easy to brief Members on the laser engraving machine. First of all, to talk about its structure, classification and development of a preliminary understanding of laser engraving machine characteristics. Followed by introduction of laser processing techniques and laser engraving machine working principle and use of software, etc., from which to learn more about laser engraving machine. Finally talk about the use of laser engraving machine for attention.
Material-shall be free from seams, silver or cracks, and shall be smooth and uniform in size.
材料应没有缝、银（说明：silver只有此解说，好像有点勉强）或裂缝，而且应该光滑和尺寸均匀。
Temper-all material shall be thoroughly and evenly annealed, and dead soft, unless otherwise specified by the purchase order.
除非采购订单另有规定，否则所有材料的回火应该彻底而均匀地退火，完全软化。
Round wire, when wound into a helix on an arbor, approximately five times the diameter of the wire, shall be uniformly spaced when stretched to three times its close wound length.
当圆金属丝在一根直径大约是金属丝5倍直径的芯轴上绕成一个螺旋时，该金属丝在受到伸展而达到其紧密卷绕长度的三倍时，应均匀间隔。
Winding:
Wire,0.081inch diameter and under, shall be shipped on spools, wire over 0.081 inch diameter may be shipped in coils. Each spool shall contain one continuous length only.
绕线：
直径0.081英寸及以下的金属丝应该在线盘上发货，超过0.081英寸直径的金属丝可以盘成线圈发货。每个线盘应只含一根连续长度。
Strip orders will specify in coils or cut length. When coils are specified, strip shall be ribbon wound in flat spirals containing one continuous length per coil.
扁线订单(次序？）将规定线圈或截断长度。当规定采取线圈时，扁线应该以扁带形式卷绕成扁平的螺旋，它每个线圈包含一个连续的长度。
Identification-shall be a pink label on the flange of spools and pink paint on the ends of coiled wire , and on the edges of strip in coils or cut lengths.
标识——应该是在线盘侧板上的粉红色标签，或是线圈状金属丝上的粉红色油漆，以及在线圈或截断长度中扁线边缘上的粉红色油漆。
The resistance tolerance per foot of any portion of the wire in any one spool or coil shall be 2%
在任何一个线盘或线圈中，任何一部分金属丝的每英尺电阻公差应为2％。
材料：不能有任何的接缝、镀银或者裂痕，另外应当非常平滑并且具有统一的尺寸。
煅烧：所有材料都是应当经过彻底、适当的煅烧的软钢板，除非采购协议中特殊列明。圆线丝，螺旋缠绕在线轴之上时，其直径应为线丝直径的五倍。如果拉伸长度为缠绕长度的3倍时，则需统一放置。
绕线：
所有直径不超过0.081英寸的线在运输时都应当绕在线轴之上。直径超过0.081英寸的线则应该盘成卷线。每个线轴之上只能缠绕一根完整的线。
带线订单会列明要求盘线或者每段的长度。如果列明为盘线，那么所有的线都应当按照所要求的长度绕成平螺旋线，每组平螺旋线为一根，长度相同。
商标：
应该是在线轴侧面的粉色商标，以及在盘线两端或者在盘装线带或者定长线带两端的粉色喷漆。
在任何轴线或者盘线的任何部分的电阻公差为每英尺2%。
非常不专业~~
材料应该避免留下焊痕、镀银痕迹和裂缝，而是应该光滑并尺寸一致。
回火-所有的材料应该彻底平稳地进行退火，要绝对温和，除非订单有特殊说明。环绕的电缆如果盘绕在大约五倍电缆直径的轴上时一律要留下间隔，当它伸展到三倍时就接近了它的损伤长度限值。
线圈-直径0.081英寸及以下的电缆应该绕在线轴上运输，而大于0.081英寸的电缆可以绕在镀锡卷板运输。每一个线轴上只能缠绕一整根电缆。电缆需要截断的订单要在镀锡卷板上指明或标出定尺长度。当镀锡卷板被指明时，截断的电缆应置于光滑旋管上，每个镀锡卷板只能缠绕一整根。
用于辨认-在线轴边缘贴粉红标签，在盘绕的电缆末端和镀锡卷板上的盘绕电缆切口处或定尺长度处进行粉红色喷漆。
对于任何线轴或镀锡卷板上的电缆，其任何部分每英尺的电阻公差应该为2%。
材料必须无接缝，镀银和裂痕，而且光滑并尺寸一致。
所有回火材料必须彻底均匀退火，软钢板回火.除非定单另有说明。
圆丝在支架上缠绕成螺旋状时，大约五倍与圆丝直径且伸展为3倍密切缠绕长度时应均匀分布。
绕线：
直径不超过0.081英寸绕线以线轴运输。直径超过0.081英寸绕线以线圈运输。每个线轴只能包含一条连续的电线。
条状定单必须规定是线圈或切割长度。当规定线圈时，条状材料应是以带状平螺旋线缠绕，每个线圈只能包含一条连续的电线。
在线轴边缘放粉红色鉴别标签，在线圈电线尾部和条状线圈边缘或切割尺寸有粉红色喷漆。
每个线轴或线圈绕线每英尺任何部位的电阻公差小于2%。
需要兼职翻译的找我吧
无Material-shall、银、裂缝,并应平滑均匀的大小。
Temper-all应彻底和均匀材料,死去的软、退火,除非另有规定的采购订单。圆的电线,当伤口成螺旋状的大约5次,直径的电线,应当均匀间距当伸展到三倍于接近伤口的长度。
蜿蜒的.
线、0.081inch直径和下,须在装运池、丝0.081英寸直径可能早于线圈。报告应包含一个连续的每只长度。
将剥订单的线圈或是骟了的长度。当线圈,应当确定在平坦的螺旋型色带伤口的一个连续的每卷包含。
是一个粉红色的标签上Identification-shall法兰的轴和粉红色组合成的心型涂料在连续的两端,边缘线的长度在线圈或削减。
每足的阻力容忍任何部分的线在任何一个管或线圈应小于2%
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