帮我看一下我写的英语作文？
I
like
painting
since
i
am
at
early
age.At
that
time
i
often
watch
the
VCD
of
the
cartoon,and
i
begin
to
draw
the
cartoon
character
inside
when
seeing
a
good
screen
and
suspending
the
screen.
I
really
begin
to
learn
drawing
and
painting
when
i
was
at
primary
school,with
my
bedroom
filled
with
my
works.
Usually
i
take
part
in
painting
competition
organised
by
the
school.
I
got
the
first
prize
of
drawing
for
children
when
at
grade
four
with
my
work
,which
was
the
beautiful
park
in
summer.
Besides
i
have
been
drawing
some
cartoon
logos
in
a
notebook
,books
or
on
socks.Sometimes
i
will
go
to
look
at
some
paintings.
I
am
looking
forward
to
studying
different
types
of
painting
in
the
future
while
i
am
free.
说实话，你的作文有几个地方显示出很大的语法知识漏洞，如“
Primary
school
when
the
real
drawings
and
paintings”“four
in
primary
schools
grade
group
was
the
first
prize
drawing
for
children”
尤其是这句“Sometimes
look
at
some
paintings”掉了主语，可能你打的时候掉了。这句“
I
remember
I
was
painting
the
park
in
summer”时态用错了，was/were
doing这是说在过去的某个时候某个动作一直在进行。我觉得不用把这句写的很详细，主要突出的是“我画的是夏天的公园”就可以了。
我改后的作文，按照你的要求保留原意，一些地方的词也是用的你的原词。
因为我写的可能部分词你们没涉及到，就保留了原文。
另外一些有特色的句式也加了几个，如“I
am
looking
forward
to
”“with
my
bedroom
filled
with
my
works”（这句是个with的伴随状语从句，不知你们涉及到没）
就这些了，建议你看一下语法知识吧。
你好，字数过多，你在考研吧？总体水平还是中等偏上的。
第一段。1、第一句没有谓语， 2、becomes her very well 你确定有这种用法？如果没有的话，换种说法吧，3、 beautiful features是否换为beauty更好？
第二段。1、第一句我认为有点质疑，有直译之嫌，2、第二排的charm应该用charmful吧？3、 第三排的root和turn最好保持时态的一致性。
第三段。理由阐述了2点，但是字数太多，有刻意追求词藻和字数之嫌，建议增加理由，适当的追求词藻，求精辟。
Dear Josh Wilson,
My name's Betty Wu, an assistant in the Prodction Department of a car manufacturing company. I'm writting to invite you to our training course as a trainer.
As we know, you are an expert in this area. I'd be glad if you could attend training course for some new employees. The training course will begin at 9:00 a.m. next Monday at Long Yi Center.
I wonder if you can come.
Yours Sincerely
Betty Wu
内容过短，错别字过多
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